Heartworld Transformation Fairy Tale Part 2: Open Your Heart

A few months ago I wrote a short story here.  It was called Heartworld Transformation Fairy Tale and it told a little magical story about a person who transformed their heart and then learned how to open it up to others, to give and receive.  At some point the person gets hurt and has to start over, but the moral of the story is that you always can.  The soil on the grounds of your heart world, when properly cared for, gives endless abundance.  The story was inspired by a time when a customer of mine at the burger place opened his heart and home to me to spend beautiful family time with him and his lovely little son.  We watched movies together and cooked together and often times I would just sit and work on my poetry while he did his programming job.  He was a beautiful person and he gave me the family type warmth that I miss so much being away from my parents and brothers.

So I was inspired to write that story, but I think that at the time I didn't understand nearly as well as I do now the power of transforming my heart--giving it strength, power, and fearlessly exposing it over and over and over, as a practice--and the way that would open me up to and attract so many loving and deeply complex souls.  When people open up to you, it's like staring at the ocean in the sun: you see the incredible light reflecting off the surface and can only feel, sense, and imagine what is in its grand mysterious depths.   Now that I have gotten to a place where my heart is almost always open to others, I have started to feel a closeness to people in my everyday life, even those I don't necessarily have a large or varied relationship with, a closeness I never could have imagined.  And a true reciprocation of energy and of caring with people.  And it fills my days with surprise gifts of kindness, warm words, people offering help or guidance, people sharing things (food, matches, their feelings, their ideas, their art, their smiles) and even outright giving me things that I didn't even ask for, just because it makes them feel good.

My life has become profusely full here in Portland.  And I realize now that I did create it that way, by daring myself to improve.  From not long after I got here I opened my heart up by giving to the community through volunteer work and by joining a spiritual community, and by working a job that I really didn't enjoy with people who I really did love to be around.  Going on a meditation, doing yoga for a little bit, learning how to become an independent and free spirit, taking counseling, reaching out for help when I was afraid and feeling helpless, practicing communication and developing relationships out of thin air--all of these experiences have helped me to grow and to open up.  And along the way I have picked up a wide array of incredible connections.  And recently I was blessed with an incredible new job where I met three coworkers who are by far some of the most incredible people I've ever had the good fortune of working with.  And while one of them left, we still see one another, have a profound friendship, and she is still present in my heart every work day. (Her cubicle used to be next to mine.  And her old nameplate is sitting on my desk right behind my laptop at home as I type this.)

One of them became my carpool buddy and we have incredibly open and simply astounding conversation every morning and afternoon on the drive that centers and grounds me spiritually in a way I never would have thought I could receive on a simple carpool drive.  He is one of the most generous and thoughtful people I have ever met.  Everyday he surprises me with something--usually it's an abundance of fascinating thoughts and feelings and a handful of completely unnecessary out-of-his-way kind gestures to me and others.  He also makes me laugh.  And he makes me notice things, and take a breath.  I remember when I met him he was "the guy who also used to serve, just like me, and was kind and practical when he trained me." But back then I only knew him on a surface level and I had no idea of the beauty underneath.

And the third is a person I didn't even notice for at least a month of working just a few cubicles away. But in retrospect, I remember now that during that month he came several times to my cubicle, while I was still new and scared and learning my job, and he offered me little odds and ends to help me with my training.  I remember he was quite shy and shaky and gave off such a powerful energy it would always stop me in my tracks.  But he would just stop by for a moment and then just like that gone, back to his desk.  And the most I did back then was to think "Well what a strange and nervous little thing he is.... and I wonder why he gives me things..."  Well anyway time passed and somehow we connected.  And getting to know him has been absolutely among the best experiences I have had at my job, and in my life in general.  He is talented, intelligent, interesting, funny and kind.  And he's not nearly as shy once he knows you. He has a fabulous personality and so much to share. And hell, I was probably just as shy when I got to my new job, I just never saw it reflected back at me so vibrantly.  Vulnerability is positively captivating, honorable, and brave.  I admire him for creating and nurturing our connection, even when I was absent-minded and scattered by information overload early on.

The moral of this story is for god's sake open your heart.  And not just to your family and close friends the people you already "trust."  Learn to feel safe opening your heart to everyone.  Practice doing it in little ways all day long with everyone who passes through your day.  Then try doing in bigger ways with new people you've never given to or shared with before.  Respect your own boundaries and never give or share in any way that makes you feel unsafe.  But this practice of opening my heart has been the absolute key to my happiness.

It has transformed my life.